Feeling At Home

Reading an Anne Tyler novel is like visiting an old friend. I've read so many of her books that at this point her characters seem like people I know. They're are not larger than life; they're not heroic or passionate or despicable. They live ordinary lives in Baltimore and mostly try to do the best they can. They sometimes attempt to squirm out from under a smothering family or disappointing spouse, but they never stray too far. Not exactly Anna Karenina.

In Digging to America Tyler focuses on two families who are adopting baby girls from Korea. Their paths cross at the Baltimore airport as their babies arrive. The Donaldson parents, Bitsy and Brad, are accompanied by a noisy entourage of friends and family as they greet their new arrival. In contrast Sami and Ziba Yazdan hover in the background, joined only by Sami's imperious Iranian mother Maryam. As the story moves on the contrasts continue. The Donaldsons retain their baby's birth name of Jin-Ho and celebrate her Korean heritage every chance they get. The Yasdan's change their daughter's name from Sooki to Susan. They are themselves the children of Iranian immigrants and, having learned to assimilate into the American culture, they want the same for their child. For special occasions Jin-Ho is dressed in a kimono while Susan is dressed in a party dress and Mary Janes.

The Donaldsons include the Yasdans in their lives, inviting them to an annual “Arrival Party” for the two girls and an autumn leaf-raking party (an event which mystifies the Yasdans). The Yasdans reciprocate with an Iranian celebration where Maryam and Ziba organize an astounding array of Persian dishes, although Maryam is less than enthusiastic ("Why should they have to put on these ethnic demonstrations? Let the Donaldsons go to the Smithsonian for that!"). Initially the purpose of these events is to ensure that the little girls become best friends. As the years go by it is clear that the two have little in common other than their place of birth. But the gatherings allow Tyler to subtly explore what it means to be American (typified by the pushy but good-hearted Bitsy), and how it feels to be an outsider. Maryam typifies this conflict; she takes pride in her otherness and her self sufficiency and is often appalled by the 'too much information' tendencies of the Donaldsons. But she slowly comes to realize that her stubborn insistence on remaining an outsider may be costing her too much.

Ann Tyler was married to the Iranian-born psychiatrist Taghi Modarressi (he died nearly 10 years ago), and this no doubt explains why her Iranian characters seem as real and complex as those from her native Baltimore. Although I wouldn't pick this as my favorite Tyler novel, I once again enjoyed getting to know her characters.

Physical Risk and Spiritual Reward

I recently took a Learn to Row class so it wasn’t long afterward until I dusted off Rowing to Latitude: Journeys Along the Arctic's Edge by Jill Fredston which had been sitting unread on my bookshelf. What do avalanche experts in Alaska do in the summer “off season”? At least two of them take to the water in very small boats. First, the boats. Jill uses a rowing shell which means she is always facing backwards to the direction of travel; and her husband, Doug Fesler, goes along in a kayak facing forward. It seems to work for them. Second, the water. - in this case, the Arctic. In 15 years, they have rowed more than 20,000 miles: from Seattle to Skagway; the lengths of the Yukon and Mackenzie Rivers; the entire coast of Norway; the western coast of Greenland; the coast of Labrador; and around the island of Spitsbergen, among others. To appreciate fully the enormity of these undertakings you really need to look at a map (which is provided in the book).

And then there are the weather conditions. In Jill’s own words: “To appreciate the conditions, try spending the day lying fully clothed in a bathtub, under a steady shower of cold water. For realism, add a fan to simulate twenty-mile-per-hour winds.” But believe it or not, she writes so well that I found myself actually considering such an adventure as a possibility (never mind the physical strength required and the dangers from wind, water, icebergs and bears).

Jill informs us that the word “travel” comes from the French root “travail” meaning hard work or arduous effort. That is certainly true for these excursions. You might be asking yourself as I did: Why, if it is so bad, do they keep doing it? Jill has an answer but I’ll let her tell it.

Most of us will never take to the seas in a small boat but each of us will face challenges either for ourselves or those we love. So does a book like this have any lessons to offer us? Absolutely. “Don’t think about the icy surf, the cliffs, the ‘what-ifs.’ Take it one stroke, one mile, one hour at a time. Be patient, let events evolve, take things as they come…Breathe, find a rhythm, stay loose, balance the boat, keep pulling.”

Never Argue with a Woman

One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out.
She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to read her book. The peace and solitude are magnificent.
Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, “Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?”
“Reading a book,” she replies, (thinking, “Isn't that obvious?”).
“You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,” he informs her.
“I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading.”
“Yes, but I see you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.”
“If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,” says the woman.
“But I haven't even touched you,” says the Game Warden.
“That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.”
“Have a nice day ma'am,” and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

Note: Thank you to our faithful reader Diane who forwarded the above. I just couldn't resist posting it. I've also posted it on our bookclub4evr wikispace. Back to more serious reading matters tomorrow.

Art and Life

The Other Side of You by Salley Vickers is the story of a psychological journey. The main portion of the novel is an extended session between psychologist David McBride and his suicidal patient Elizabeth Cruikshank. David, the narrator of the story, feels especially able to deal with the “suicidally disposed” because of an incident in his own childhood in which his beloved older brother was killed before his eyes in a traffic accident when he was five years old. He has a sort of survivor's guilt that makes him sensitive to those who choose to end their lives. But his early attempts to reach his uncommunicative patient are unsuccessful. Finally, her brief reference to Caravaggio draws him to view the painting The Supper at Emmaus in London and when he describes his reaction to her, Elizabeth opens up and begins to expose her other self.

Elizabeth's story of what led her to suicide forms the main portion of the book, and I don't want to give away too much of it. But her first words concerning her tragedy - “I was faithless” - are profoundly important. It's not just that she was unfaithful, but that she lacked the faith to embrace the love she was offered. As David gently questions her, he also begins to realize that his own life mirrors Elizabeth's. The trauma in his past has caused him to close himself off, to remain in a marriage with the self absorbed wife. When Elizabeth asks him “"Why do you do this? Is it love or damage?" he answers, "Possibly both."

Vickers invokes the image of the Caravaggio paintings frequently as the story progresses. If you've read St. Luke lately you'll remember that it tells the story of two of Jesus's followers traveling from Jerusalem to Emmaus after the crucifixion, mourning the death of their leader. They are joined by a mysterious stranger, and when he breaks bread with them at supper he reveals himself as the risen Christ and then disappears. David and Elizabeth are also travelers, and each helps the other to the revelation of the “other side” of themselves.

The title for Vickers's novel comes,from T.S. Eliot's The Wasteland ("Who is the third who walks always beside you? . . . Who is that on the other side of you?"). Although some may find the language somewhat stilted at times, I thought it was beautifully poetic in capturing the human emotions of loss, regret and redemption.